wild awareness

Underneath it all, we are wild and we know it.
-Reggie Ray, Buddhist scholar
I'm curious; what does wild mean to you?  

to me wild means trusting my instincts; lying on a sunny boulder feeling like a lizard, no human sounds but my own breath and heart beat.  wild is knowing how to birth a baby with no instructions from a doctor.  wild is preferring to sip my tea overlooking a trickling creek than in a bustling cafe.  wild is knowing with my entire being that I am part of this earth, just as other creatures are. exactly.

wild is feeling the pulse of the earth as our own.  running. walking through a forest, along a beach, up a mountain and feeling "at home".  wild is building a fire to stay warm; heck, it's just knowing that it is fire that keeps us warm.  taking food from the earth with our own hands is wild.  it's instinct; it's intuition.

wild is being connected to life's processes.  it's feeling something in our gut; that's what animals do. but beyond that, wild is trusting it.

understanding how nature works helps us understand our own wildness but it's not necessary.  we don't need to understand why ants do what they do to appreciate how we are the same (if you don't think we are similar, look at what they are doing.)

babies know they are wild when they cry for a breast (until we teach them it's not time; they have to be nourished on a schedule.)  toddlers still know they are wild until we teach them it's not okay to sit in the dirt.  we culture and domesticize the wild right out of us pretty quickly.  On The Surface.

but if we sit alone by the creek long enough, or watch the birds collecting seeds before a storm, or sleep under stars long enough, we will remember.  growing food.  hunting food.  chopping wood.  birthing babies.  making fire with a stick.  defending our young.  swimming in wild water.  lying in a sunny patch in the forest with a lover.  these things can help us remember.
  -being on the computer?  probably not.
  -rushing in to starbucks for a pumpkin latte? not so much.
  -checking stats on facebook/blog/website?  nope

but hey, I'm not making fun - I do these things too.  They're just not my wildest moments.

we have jobs, we have children and laundry and orthodontist appointments.  we have oil changes, toilets to clean, teacher conferences and bills to pay.  But, I am a wild creature and I know it.  whether it is a trait valued in our culture or not.

So, what does wild mean to you?

To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Geronimo's Cabin

Deep in the Prescott National Forest is a legendary cabin.  To find it you must be lucky or guided or know someone who knows someone.  There are no directions; no trails or roads to speak of and no cell service.  Geronimo's cabin stands preserved and respected by those who stumble upon it.  
Several pairs of boots are strewn about the cabin, and one sits on the mantle beside an old tin can of dried flowers and twigs.  
The cabin is built into the hillside, nestled into a large boulder.  The stove pipe emerges from the old tin roof:  a reminder of warm nights.  Though the story goes that he went to the mountains out of a broken heart and lived there until his death in the early 50's.  
Lying in the grass in the sunny forest below the cabin, I could feel why the woodcutter Geronimo chose this place.  It is secluded and not near an obvious water source, miles and miles to the nearest access point.  If you want to be left alone you go where no one would think to look.  
Some people understand the forest is where to go if you want to heal.  
I do.  
Geronimo did.
  

cowboy cabin for an introvert

it is no secret i am an introvert; not to be confused with a misanthrope.  i love humans and i love my friends.  
  introverts are often drained of energy after lengthy interactions with other humans; contrast this to extroverts who are energized by being with groups.  
introverts think deeply; talk sparingly.
introverts love solitude; they love quiet; they love home.
enter the wilderness cabin (aka:  the bunkhouse), my dream for introversion.  
it's where i hope to go to recover.
to replenish the spirit.
this particular dreamy cabin is about 300 sqare feet of
remote, rustic minimalist living.
cabin is in an undisclosed location in the mountains of Arizona.